Lancer || Diarmuid Ua Duibhne (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
croibhristeoir) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
tvk2011-09-30 10:03 pm
croibhristeoir) wrote in tvk2011-09-30 10:03 pm
Entry tags:
⚔ 006; [video/action]
[phone; morning; locked to Sola-Ui on Saber's phone]
Saber? [He wasn't worried, strictly speaking. Of course Saber could take care of herself, occasional mishap aside. But it was strange that she hadn't returned last night. And the fact that he hadn't heard from her...he almost might have called that 'suspicious'.]
I haven't spoken to you recently, are you alright?
[Surely she was just with Shirou. Right?]
[Intuition rarely failed a knight. And Lancer's was telling him something was not right at all.]
[action; early evening]
[Lancer didn't know what to do. He didn't know anything. The former Servant in glasses sat on a park bench staring blankly at exactly nothing.]
[It was all his fault. Saber had died--by a hand not his own--and it was all his fault.]
[He didn't know what hurt more. The fact that again one of that pair had ruined everything and stolen his chance for a fight with her, or the fact that this would not have happened if he'd kept his mouth shut and just gone along with Sola's obsession. She would have been unhurt, Saber would have been alive, and Lancer...]
[Lancer would have been as miserable now as he was in Fuyuki. A small price to pay.]
[Today he likely looked nothing like the amicable, smiling and cheerful indivudual he so often was--there was a touch of ice in gold eyes, a strange sense of detachment in the way he held himself and stared at nothing. He had to stay that way. Lancer...didn't want to be angry. He didn't want to fly into the screaming anger of that vengeful spirit that had died in the Fourth War.]
[More than anything he didn't want it to keep hurting.]
Saber? [He wasn't worried, strictly speaking. Of course Saber could take care of herself, occasional mishap aside. But it was strange that she hadn't returned last night. And the fact that he hadn't heard from her...he almost might have called that 'suspicious'.]
I haven't spoken to you recently, are you alright?
[Surely she was just with Shirou. Right?]
[Intuition rarely failed a knight. And Lancer's was telling him something was not right at all.]
[action; early evening]
[Lancer didn't know what to do. He didn't know anything. The former Servant in glasses sat on a park bench staring blankly at exactly nothing.]
[It was all his fault. Saber had died--by a hand not his own--and it was all his fault.]
[He didn't know what hurt more. The fact that again one of that pair had ruined everything and stolen his chance for a fight with her, or the fact that this would not have happened if he'd kept his mouth shut and just gone along with Sola's obsession. She would have been unhurt, Saber would have been alive, and Lancer...]
[Lancer would have been as miserable now as he was in Fuyuki. A small price to pay.]
[Today he likely looked nothing like the amicable, smiling and cheerful indivudual he so often was--there was a touch of ice in gold eyes, a strange sense of detachment in the way he held himself and stared at nothing. He had to stay that way. Lancer...didn't want to be angry. He didn't want to fly into the screaming anger of that vengeful spirit that had died in the Fourth War.]
[More than anything he didn't want it to keep hurting.]
Phone
Phone
Phone
Phone
Phone
[That anger he had tried to push away, the sudden explosive rage he had died with...all came rushing back in a matter of moments.]
You don't--you could never understand. You don't realize what this means. I am the only one allowed to kill Saber, and when I do it will be in a fair and honorable fight. I won't drown her like some coward!
Phone
......
.......................
I'm... sorry...
[Her voice choked with sobs, she let her finger hover over the "end call" button but stilled it there. No, it would be an insult to him to run. To cut the call and hide. If he was angry, let him take it out on her. It hurt, but she had hurt him. She had hurt him.
When had she forgotten that she wanted to make him smile at her again?]
Phone
[Deep breath. He didn't want to be angry anymore, Lancer had to remember that. The enraged spirit that had died in Fuyuki...he didn't want to be like that. When he did speak again, his tone was annoyed but notably calmer.]
Sola. Where are you right now?
Phone
Phone
Phone
I'll wait for you. [Her fingers grip the phone so tightly that her knuckles turn white.]
Phone
I'll be there shortly.
Phone
[She didn't care cut the feed.]
Phone
[Sup, Sola. Enjoy that glasses-wearing weaponized sexiness right here.]
Phone
Lancer!
Phone
[Yep, deadpan.]
Phone
...hello.
Phone
Phone
Lancer... I love you.
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[There was sympathy in his tone as he spoke; this wasn't entirely her fault, Lancer knew that. He was angry, yes--but he didn't want to hurt her. No more than rejection already would.]
[Even if he had loved Sola at some point--which clearly was not the case--he didn't want this. He didn't want a reminder of the Master that had mistrusted and discarded him. And he didn't want a reminder of either time his curse had led to his downfall.]
You shouldn't. And you know that I can't.
[He took Saber's phone, speaking as calmly as he could given the circumstances.]
I am not looking to repeat the events of my lifetime again. And I no longer want more than a passing connection to you or to Kayneth.
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[It hurt. It hurt so much. No, she didn't want to lose him. But if he was going to leave her anyway...]
I can't just forget you! I can't just... walk away and pretend you don't exist!
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[A sigh.]
I know it's upsetting. For that, I apologize. But it would be better for all involved if we could simply separate ourselves now.
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You must hate me to treat me this way.
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[But he didn't move in response, either.]
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No, she can't lose him. Even while she's angry and frightened and lost and miserable. So with dignity she released him, blinking her tears back and fixing him with her usual cool gaze.
She would make him love her if he won't love her normally.]
Go then. Mourn the loss of your lover, Diarmuid Ua Duibhne.
[I'll be watching you..]
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[He turned to leave with a sigh, looking back at her over his shoulder.]
This is the only time I'll be patient with you, Sola. If you should hurt anyone close to me again, then I will personally be sure you regret it.
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