Kiritsugu Emiya (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
maguskiller) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
tvk2012-01-22 06:00 am
maguskiller) wrote in tvk2012-01-22 06:00 am
Entry tags:
6x Accel
[Action; Private to Kayneth]
[Priorities change. Be it through trauma, or sheer old boredom, it is difficult to stick to one motivation your entire life. Eventually, your beliefs are defied in one way or another, forcing you to either adapt or die.]
[Kiritsugu has reached that point, and yet, has not reached that point. The core of his ideas remains the same. Protect. Save. But where once he saw every life as equally valuable, now he no longer strives to save any but those he cares about. Yet deep down, the same desire to be a hero of justice tears him up inside.]
[Yes. Kayneth's appearance inspires feelings in him he does not quite recognize. Regret has been a constant companion since the culmination of the Fourth War, but what currently plagues him is much more akin to shame, an emotion Kiritsugu has never felt before.]
[Yet Kiritsugu did not learn the ability to block out all emotions to reach his goals. He was born with it.]
[Other unnatural feelings well up in him. Bizarre emotions that can only be caused by another incident. He will not let it happen. He will stop the appearance of Shadows before another one emerges. But to do so, he must rid himself of interruptions.]
[It takes a few days for Kiritsugu to find a moment when Kayneth Archibald would be the only man in his floor, but he does not waste a single second of it. Inserting poison gas into the air vent was not too difficult a task. Not when the hotel was of average quality, and thus, possessing a security system easily infiltrated by him. Nothing fancy by any definition. If he could provide the second El-Melloi with a tranquilizer gun, he would have been remiss to not have gotten one himself. Guards are easier to take down than Shadows, and falling asleep on the job is not too rare an occurrence.]
[...Once again, he took precautions against unnecessary losses. It was one thing to do so when lives were at stake and the balance could be tipped too much, but nobody would have truly died here. Poisoning the entire floor for the afternoon was not negotiable, as directing his attack against nobody but Kayneth would have drawn much more suspicion, but to have waited until he was the only one there... it must have been simply to avoid too much publicity. Wouldn't do if this stirred up a frenzy.]
[He can't help but find the irony in smoking at a moment like this.]
[Public]
[Typical of his afternoons, Kiritsugu can be found at his job at a local restaurant. He's passing the time organizing the service, waiting for his break to come. He seems to have invited Shirou to talk during that time. Whatever news come up on any TVs go seemingly ignored by him.]
[He also seems to be averting eye contact with Saber. While Kiritsugu would typically ignore her, he would not actually display any signs of her presence influencing him. Something's wrong.]
[Priorities change. Be it through trauma, or sheer old boredom, it is difficult to stick to one motivation your entire life. Eventually, your beliefs are defied in one way or another, forcing you to either adapt or die.]
[Kiritsugu has reached that point, and yet, has not reached that point. The core of his ideas remains the same. Protect. Save. But where once he saw every life as equally valuable, now he no longer strives to save any but those he cares about. Yet deep down, the same desire to be a hero of justice tears him up inside.]
[Yes. Kayneth's appearance inspires feelings in him he does not quite recognize. Regret has been a constant companion since the culmination of the Fourth War, but what currently plagues him is much more akin to shame, an emotion Kiritsugu has never felt before.]
[Yet Kiritsugu did not learn the ability to block out all emotions to reach his goals. He was born with it.]
[Other unnatural feelings well up in him. Bizarre emotions that can only be caused by another incident. He will not let it happen. He will stop the appearance of Shadows before another one emerges. But to do so, he must rid himself of interruptions.]
[It takes a few days for Kiritsugu to find a moment when Kayneth Archibald would be the only man in his floor, but he does not waste a single second of it. Inserting poison gas into the air vent was not too difficult a task. Not when the hotel was of average quality, and thus, possessing a security system easily infiltrated by him. Nothing fancy by any definition. If he could provide the second El-Melloi with a tranquilizer gun, he would have been remiss to not have gotten one himself. Guards are easier to take down than Shadows, and falling asleep on the job is not too rare an occurrence.]
[...Once again, he took precautions against unnecessary losses. It was one thing to do so when lives were at stake and the balance could be tipped too much, but nobody would have truly died here. Poisoning the entire floor for the afternoon was not negotiable, as directing his attack against nobody but Kayneth would have drawn much more suspicion, but to have waited until he was the only one there... it must have been simply to avoid too much publicity. Wouldn't do if this stirred up a frenzy.]
[He can't help but find the irony in smoking at a moment like this.]
[Public]
[Typical of his afternoons, Kiritsugu can be found at his job at a local restaurant. He's passing the time organizing the service, waiting for his break to come. He seems to have invited Shirou to talk during that time. Whatever news come up on any TVs go seemingly ignored by him.]
[He also seems to be averting eye contact with Saber. While Kiritsugu would typically ignore her, he would not actually display any signs of her presence influencing him. Something's wrong.]
no subject
[Never mind the fact that he has met his nemesis, or seen the faces of so many people that might have as well been vengeful ghosts. To Kiritsugu, this is a hell more personalized than any he has seen before. At least, any since that one day...]
[He turns to look at her. Not through Saber, as if she was mere air. It's clear he's listening to her, as much as he may dislike that fact. At the same time, he can't help but pursue it.]
no subject
I love Shirou. [ Why is it she can only bring that up when she speaks to him? Why can't it be "I hate you!" or "Beg for my forgiveness so that I may deny you of such!" No, she's incapable of feeling that way even if she wants to make him pay. ] I love him and he loves me. I want to spend time with him and I want to.. I want to be with him as much as I can be here! He tries so hard to make things work between the two of us and I try, so it is about time you try as well, Kiritsugu!
no subject
[Kiritsugu's words sound wistful. Void of hope. Unlike anything he would ever say to another conscious being, because it isn't. It appears he is speaking to himself, in an attempt to reconcile his desire to stay silent towards her and voice his frustration with this entire situation in two succinct words.]
Why him...?
[The War already ruined one of them. Kiritsugu can accumulate as much motivation as he wishes, but the memory of murdering the image of his loved ones with his bare hands will always be waiting at the end of the road, stopping him from fully becoming the man he was ten years ago. So why must Shirou be involved with remnants of the War as well? Kiritsugu carries the title of Magus Killer, but he no longer truly is that man. Not when the most he can do is try to get a reason out of the person who he refuses to see as anything but a girl turned into a cog of war.]
no subject
[ For Arturia Pendragon it was that simple. If Shirou Emiya was to love her, then she will devote herself in return with all of her being. It was that boy who helped her overcome her depression and low self-esteem. It was that boy who helped her accept herself for who she is. ]
And because.. because I love him too!