tvk | One [Video]: In Which Klaus Demands Answers

[Suddenly, a video feed clicks on. The image is blurry and moving sporadically: this video is clearly accidental.]

--pears to be some sort of... oh.

[The image stabilizes somewhat. It reveals itself to be the face of an older man with absolutely ridiculous hair, looking very Perplexed but altogether Intrigued.]

Interesting. I assume this is some manner of recording or communication device, then. And if you press --

[The feed clicks off suddenly, and then returns a few seconds later.]

-- relatively simple, all things considered. If only the buttons weren't so deucedly small... but it will have to do.

I am Baron Klaus Wulfenbach and, if anyone is listening, I would like some answers. A cursory investigation of this place has made it painfully obvious that I am very, very far from my homeland and, it appears, my place in relative space-time. I would like an explanation from someone more familiar with this universe as to where I am, when I am and, perhaps, the general history of this city. It is discomfiting enough to be removed from one's home when one is in the middle of attempting to stop a war; it is far worse to be removed to somewhere that one knows nothing about. Thus, I require information, if you please, and quickly.

[And he'll just stay on the damn phone until someone answers him, too. How long can you resist that Imperious Stare, Prospero?]

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[Uh oh. You said the f-word, Kanda. Klaus bristles slightly.]

Figurehead? Figurehead? That is no way to rule a country! A ruler depends on his strength to gauge the strength of his armies, not the other way around. Doing nothing earns no respect. Riding at the front of the lines and lopping off the head of anyone who looks surprised inspires fear and therefore obedience.

[So. There.]

[Oh, he likes you. If you're gonna be a tyrannical asshole for a ruler, you better do it right.]

Oh, look, somebody who gets it. Even if slaughtering people for looking surprised is fucking excessive.

It was something of a hyperbolic statement for effect, I will admit. The forces I fight tend to be made partly, if not mostly, of monsters that don't actually have the capability to feel surprise because it was not part of their design.

[And hey now. He's not a tyrannical asshole. He's a reluctant tyrannical asshole. Politics, y u exist.]

Edited 2011-08-15 19:29 (UTC)

Tch. Would that most heads of state took your example.

[Seriously.]

[... Kanda, he likes you. You're the first person who hasn't told him his methods of ruling are 'too extreme'.]

I take it you have had more of your share of heads of state that don't?

[Hey, as much as he likes being a free soul, if someone is going to rule, they should rule.]

Putting it lightly. They don't even know the fucked-up things their puppets are doing.

Hmf. Even a figurehead should keep track of what the people in charge are doing in his name. Anything less is both lazy and quite likely suicidal.

Especially when they're religious figureheads doing it in the name of their God.

[Religious leaders, man. But hooooly crap it's nice to find someone who Gets It.]

No faster way to undermine your authority.

Oh red fire, yes. Especially when their religion is not one you personally espouse. I am lucky in that Europa is a largely non-religious country. They prefer to put their faith in old folklore which, while equally as useless, is at least much more difficult to do things in the name of.

With the exception of the Knights of Jove, of course, but they are nothing but fat old men who like to unite under a banner as an excuse to talk about the days when they were young and able to fit into decent trousers.

[Oh, give him a minute. He can't help but snicker-- that mental image is way too easy to pull up. If he were any less of a stoic, he would've busted up laughing.]

Unfortunately, it's far too easy to call the war a holy one. Whether or not we're acting as the arm of God smiting down the abominations of an evil syndicate--

[Excuse him, he's trying not to laugh. He's so jaded anymore. He doesn't even believe in the God of his church.]

That's the picture they want to paint. Seems to work for them, at any rate.

One [Video]: In Which Klaus Demands Answers

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