Lancer || Diarmuid Ua Duibhne (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
croibhristeoir) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
tvk2012-07-17 11:06 pm
croibhristeoir) wrote in tvk2012-07-17 11:06 pm
Entry tags:
⚔ 029; [video]
[In the afternoon, Diarmuid put a call out on the network--running the bookstore was getting off to a rocky start, but he'd managed to get a break at least.]
...This may sound like an odd question, but did anyone else have a strange dream last night? I'm not sure it was like anything else that I've eve--
[Static.]
[The next thing shown was a video of a strangely dreamlike quality, slightly faded and seeming not entirely connected with reality. Images came in a few quick flashes as if a channel keeps being changed in search of something--first is shown a child with bright golden eyes and a brighter smile. He was almost always at his father's side--or hiding behind him, when it came to seeing an average group of women passing by.]
[It was unmistakably Diarmuid, more so when the view switched to the first knight of the Fianna as a teenager, playfully grinning as he sparred against a second knight with flaming red hair. Likely the most notable thing about that last moment was how heartfelt and truly happy his smile was--while he smiled often, it was almost always with some tinge of broken sadness, something he'd never had in those days.]
[Static again, for only a second or two.]
[When that ended, there were no quick flashes--next came images far clearer. This was the story of a knight who never wanted fame, least of all in the way he received it. Diarmuid Ua Duibhne, the unwilling thief of his lord's fiancee that paid for his crime as only a traitor could.]
[There was no static after that, but the video seemed to cut out for a moment; if one listened carefully, they would have been able to hear a possibly familiar voice.]
['In the stories of legend, you are fairly well known for womanizing and adultery. Were you not intending to seduce your master’s fiancée?']
[It had been too much to bear. A lesser knight would have snapped under the strain long before even becoming a Servant. Diarmuid...he was different. He didn't mind accepting others' hatred, as long as he kept to what he believed was the right and honorable thing. But Kayneth...it had been too much. Being so hated and mistrusted, it made him sick and tore at his heart until there was nothing left.]
[That quiet and shy child with the bright smile, that playful teenager surrounded by his friends and fellow knights, that compassionate and self-sacrificing knight...broke.]
['Unforgivable...I'll never forgive you! You dead men who are slaved by fame, you who desecrated the glory of knights... Let my blood stain that dream! I curse the Holy Grail! I curse that your wishes will become disasters!']
[This was a man who had never known hatred, never felt rage until that one moment. No matter how unhappy his circumstances had been in life, he met it all with calm acceptance. And yet over the course of a single Holy Grail War, that legendary calm and patience had been brought down to nothing, crushed under the heel of an equally broken magus.]
[When the illusions broke, when reality cut back into the impromptu recollection of that which he wished he could forget, the video showed Diarmuid looking deathly pale and utterly horrified.]
[Without another word, he cut off the video and sank into the nearest chair with his face in his hands.]
...This may sound like an odd question, but did anyone else have a strange dream last night? I'm not sure it was like anything else that I've eve--
[Static.]
[The next thing shown was a video of a strangely dreamlike quality, slightly faded and seeming not entirely connected with reality. Images came in a few quick flashes as if a channel keeps being changed in search of something--first is shown a child with bright golden eyes and a brighter smile. He was almost always at his father's side--or hiding behind him, when it came to seeing an average group of women passing by.]
[It was unmistakably Diarmuid, more so when the view switched to the first knight of the Fianna as a teenager, playfully grinning as he sparred against a second knight with flaming red hair. Likely the most notable thing about that last moment was how heartfelt and truly happy his smile was--while he smiled often, it was almost always with some tinge of broken sadness, something he'd never had in those days.]
[Static again, for only a second or two.]
[When that ended, there were no quick flashes--next came images far clearer. This was the story of a knight who never wanted fame, least of all in the way he received it. Diarmuid Ua Duibhne, the unwilling thief of his lord's fiancee that paid for his crime as only a traitor could.]
[There was no static after that, but the video seemed to cut out for a moment; if one listened carefully, they would have been able to hear a possibly familiar voice.]
['In the stories of legend, you are fairly well known for womanizing and adultery. Were you not intending to seduce your master’s fiancée?']
[It had been too much to bear. A lesser knight would have snapped under the strain long before even becoming a Servant. Diarmuid...he was different. He didn't mind accepting others' hatred, as long as he kept to what he believed was the right and honorable thing. But Kayneth...it had been too much. Being so hated and mistrusted, it made him sick and tore at his heart until there was nothing left.]
[That quiet and shy child with the bright smile, that playful teenager surrounded by his friends and fellow knights, that compassionate and self-sacrificing knight...broke.]
['Unforgivable...I'll never forgive you! You dead men who are slaved by fame, you who desecrated the glory of knights... Let my blood stain that dream! I curse the Holy Grail! I curse that your wishes will become disasters!']
[This was a man who had never known hatred, never felt rage until that one moment. No matter how unhappy his circumstances had been in life, he met it all with calm acceptance. And yet over the course of a single Holy Grail War, that legendary calm and patience had been brought down to nothing, crushed under the heel of an equally broken magus.]
[When the illusions broke, when reality cut back into the impromptu recollection of that which he wished he could forget, the video showed Diarmuid looking deathly pale and utterly horrified.]
[Without another word, he cut off the video and sank into the nearest chair with his face in his hands.]
Action
Action
[His voice is serious, albeit soft. His eyes fell closed, then opened again, as he shifted to try to look Diarmuid in the eyes. It was the least he could do, he who had allowed him to die, who had not been there when he returned to life... He would not shrink away from this.
...human was an odd thing to call them. Both of them were beyond human in origin, whether it were in part or full. But he had the feeling that Diarmuid felt closer to being human, and why should he not encourage that?]
I could not hate you.
You are my son. For your sake I would rewind time to save you from this burden, if it were in my power. But 'tis not. No man has power over time, that much is sure, if nothing else in the world is.
I am more prone to feeling hatred for the one who hurt you so as to drive you to that rage.
Action
[He hugged his father tightly, trying to stifle a broken sob against his shoulder. What an utter failure he'd turned into. Diarmuid could barely even stand to be in his father's presence after all of this.]
I'm sorry, I'm so sorry that I've fallen this far. Even if you can so easily forgive me, I do not think I can ever forgive myself.
Action
Remember this, o Diarmuid. When one has fallen, they have two options.
They can lie helplessly in the dirt for the remainder of their life. Or they can get back on their feet. Sometimes returning to their feet requires a helping hand, and sometimes they can do it on their own. But those are the only options. If thee cannot forgive thyself now, then perhaps thee can do it in later time. When you have decided which path you would wish to follow.
Action
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[He clasped Diarmuid's face in his hands, leaning down to stare at his face.]
If thee cannot run, then let us carry you with us so that thee may not fall by the wayside!
Action
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...I'm sorry. You're right.
Action
[He brought a hand up to rest on Diarmuid's head.]
Do not fear. You will not bring suffering to us for our closeness to you.
Action
Action
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Action
[His arms tightened around the man - boy, really, at least mentally. Of that much, Aengus was sure.]
But fear not. The heralds that would lament this cry from one end of the earth to another will not come to know of this.
Action
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