tvk | Saber and Archer ❖ Video

[ The feed shows a smug Archer, and in the background a bandaged Saber can be seen. ]

You know, I think I know quite a bit about swords. I've fought with them for my whole life. I've studied them time and time again. I've seen beautiful works of steel, but for some reason I think this Saber of flesh and blood is more beautiful than all of them. What do you all think?

Ungh... [ As though on cue, a voice familiar to those on the network gives out a pained groan. ] What happened?

[ Archer chuckles, setting the device to the side. He doesn't seem to have realized that he has failed to turn it off. ]

Oh? You're finally coming to your senses? You should have known better going out with those injuries.

Injuries? [ Suddenly the King of Knights sounds a lot more indignant. ] How did you discover them?

You are covered in bandages. [ He scoffs. ] It would not take a genius to find them.

A genius or a man who knows not how to keep his hands to himself? [ Quite the accusing tone she takes, but it matters little when she reaches over for the phone he's placed down. ] Or in this situation, a man who lacks the skill to turn off a phone.

Hm? [ He glances at the phone. ] How annoying. I could have sworn i had turned it off.

Need I remind you of your own failures in other tasks? [ Suddenly there's one very groggy Saber staring down the lens of the phone. ] Everyone, this man is another Servant like the rest of us and no, he is not available for a battle tonight.

You would chastise me so quickly? [ He seems inquisitve. ] And even speak for me?

Both tasks completed with ease. [ With that, she gives a nod. ] I suppose the lot of you would enjoy speaking to the newcomer, no? Very well, let us hear it. Be brief, for I have many things to discuss with him.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[LANCERS BE MOVIN' IN ON YOUR WIMMENS, EMIYARCHER]

I only state the truth, Arturia.

Then I shall aim to make you as happy as you make me, Diarmuid.

I do not think that would be at all difficult for you. Just speaking to you is an honor that makes me truly happy.

Then us spending time alone together will leave you feeling as though you were in heaven itself, no?

It just might. I only hope that you will be as content with it.

[JESUS CHRIST THIS CONVERSATION IS DRIPPING WITH SUGAR]

Angels cannot compare to how divine time spent with you is, Diarmuid.

[ /calls my dentist ]

[GOD STOP I CAN'T EVEN...]

Ah, are you trying to flatter me?

Should I cease with my attempts?

Flattery from you is more than welcome, although quite unnecessary.

Is it not the responsibility of a king to ensure her knights are appreciated?

I dare not argue with logic like that.

Argue against it and I will just be more inventive with my compliments.

What a simply terrible fate.

The cruelest. An eternity spent guarding yourself from my affection. Whatever will you do, Diarmuid?

I will simply have to endure it. No matter how terribly it may pain me to do so.

[Placing a hand melodramatically over his heart...but grinning like an idiot. Acting skills, I haz them.]

Ah, I would not permit you to give up in battle so easily. It would be an insult my heart could not bear!

[ She can be dramatic too, alright. Except this is Saber, so she probably looks more serious than she should. ]

Of course, of course. Fate forbid your left hand should give up before you wish it to.

[ Okay yeah, she's just breaking out into giggles now. Way to go. ]

[GIGGLEFITS]

[LIKE THAT ONE SCENE IN FINAL FANTASY X ONLY NOT STUPID]

[ Yup, she's just going to fumble to cut the call now out of embarrassment... while still laughing. ]

Saber and Archer ❖ Video

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