[action]

[king_of_heroes]

[ Ah, what a beautiful day in Prospero. The sun is shinning brightly, giving enough warmth to make it the perfect day to do all sorts of outdoor activities. Children might be playing around with their bikes or toys and what not, adults might be gardening or working on cars or other silly things. It's just a perfect day.

Of course, there's always that one asshole that has to ruin it for everybody. Can you guess who that is today? Anyone out and about might have a close encounter with a rather loud streak of what appears to be golden lightning passing by! Yes, indeed. Gilgamesh has gotten back his prized Gilgil Machine and nobody is safe from his reckless driving. He's dodging in and out of traffic, riding on sidewalks, up and down stairs and rails. Is there any place he WON'T drive? Hell, he might even go so far as jumping off improvised ramps. This will surely end well for everyone. Did he almost hit? ACTUALLY hit you? Wreck something of yours? Feel free to yell at him, chase him down, or anything else! And hey, if you wanna challenge him to a race, even better! ]

Comments

[hellburner]

[Rider has rollerskates.]

[Rider has rollerskates and a grappling hook.]

[Rider has rollerskates and is standing on a street corner swinging a grappling hook over her head in preparation.]

[If she nails this timing right, this will be the best stupid thing she's ever done.]

[king_of_heroes]

[ Well, good job, Rider. The only thing is Gilgamesh quickly takes notice of the extra weigh and goes out of his way to make her little free ride HELL. Yes, he's swerving into on-coming traffic in hopes she gets hit. WHY IS HE SUCH A DICK ALL THE TIME SOMETIMES? ]

action; i regret nothing

[socializing]

[ Guess who has two thumbs and is being interrupted by some dbag on a motorcycle?

During lunch?

In his apartment suite?

On his kitchen table?

Souji is!... by some dbag Archer and his stupid yellow crotch rocket. ]

... Ah.

[ Is all Souji can muster, looking down at his half-sandwich, now with an extra helping of tire tracks, then up to Gilgamesh. How did this guy get his bike into his room so suddenly? ]

Hungry?

[king_of_heroes]

[ Well, it's not like he actually thought anyone would be home when he came crashing through. Or maybe he just didn't care, because he's staring down a Souji with a boastful grin only a king could wear, casually revving up the engine. ]

Hahaha! Look at this, mongrel! This is the bike of a true king! Do you want to touch it? [ REVREVREV. ] Too bad! A filthy mongrel like you will never be able to!

[doudemoe]

[Welp...Minato figures it's time for a nap. Because he's sick from staying up in the Dark Hour too long, and then trying to cram in some study afterwords. (Consensus: Not Worth It.)]

[So he's not happy to first hear a certain d.bag outside his dorm room...and then hearing him crash inside his dorm. How that happened when he's on the second floor idk.]

[king_of_heroes]

[ Because despite Gilgamesh not being a Rider class servant, he sure is capable of some stupid amazing things. Like riding up stairs, jumping across buildings, and... crashing into a dorm room. Hey, he did it before. This is nothing new to a king! He'll stop dead center of the room, look to Minato, then look back to the window... then back to Minato. ]

You should probably have that fixed.

wow it's gonna be hard to top the previous comments

[ex_cashcow493]

[ It's a beautiful spring day yes, and Saber's out on her own recently acquired Nice Bike.

Except instead of driving at the reckless speeds she's used to...

She's strolling along a safe 15 miles per hour.

That's because attached to the front of it is a wooden basket decorated in blue ribbons and golden lace. Sitting curled up in the basket is unmistakeably Sir-Pounce-A-Lot.

Said lion cub has a tiny helmet strapped on as well with the words 'TEAM PENDRAGON' painted on top of it.

So don't mind her when she stops to figure out just what that yellow flash was that sped past her... ]

[king_of_heroes]

[ ....wait a minute was that...?

Yup, hang on. He's just going to turn his ass around and ACTUALLY SLOW DOWN enough to catch her in his sights. ...With the cub. What. Saber, what. What. ]

...What the hell are you doing?

[dissipates]

[ Zena is strolling with her camel, whose name has yet be decided by her mun when she stops being a lazy ass and searches for a Persian name again.

Said Camel is trained to respond to aggressive hostility, such as Gil's driving skills. So don't be surprised that said animal attempts to stomp on your face when you get closer, Archer.... ]

[king_of_heroes]

[ It might not hit his face, but it does scratch up his bike. Which results in the immediate braking, zooming back over, and ANGRY GLARING AT THE BAKA. ]

Oi! Teach your damn beast some manners!

action;

[mashou]

[ LMFAO OH SHIT THAT THING LOOKS COOL. Commence chasing. He's fast but...


probably not... that fast... ]


Oooooi!! Wait up!!

[king_of_heroes]

[ Instead of waiting, he'll end up circling back around the kid with no signs of actually slowing down. ]

Ahaha! What's this? Does a mongrel think he can actually keep up with my Gilgil Machine?

[ action ]

[rocker]

[ So imagine David is walking down the street, minding his own business, just walking around a little....

... When there's suddenly some sound behind him. And he - out of sheer instinct - sidesteps just in time to avoid getting hit by that thing, thank god for A Luck stat. But even though the thing speeds by, he manages to see just who is on it.. of course. 8| Of course. ]

You might want to watch out! [ At least he's being louder than usually, but it's just so Gil will hear it even if he's already past him.. ]

[king_of_heroes]

[ Nope, he totally doesn't hear anything bro. Which is why he's apparently circling back around intent on actually hitting David this time? Oh no! ]

Whaaaat was that~?

[ridertothemoon]

[Gilgamesh, honey, you're never going to match someone with Riding skills.

Astolfo is just casually keeping up with him on his unicycle.]

It's a lovely day, isn't it?

[king_of_heroes]

[ ... ]

What.

[ Give him a moment to process this. A unicycle. Going as fast as his motorbike. What in the everliving fuck is this even. ]

[heavenscorpse]

[V/V has just gotten out of the book store after work when she sees Gilgamesh pass by, or more like a gold-colored blur.]

That looks like fun!

[king_of_heroes]

[ Nope, he could spot V/V from a mile away. Which is why he stops just in time to meet up with her. Okay, maybe he was going a little too fast and actually had to back up but WHATEVER! ]

Ah, V/V. You have no idea. Want a ride?

[enjoymyatelier]

[So Kayneth is walking through town, minding his own business. Really, today seems better than usual so far. Nothing has gone wrong yet! And, well, despite his general hatred for technology, he can't help but appreciate his recent discovery that these mobile phone things can play music. Certainly, if he retained any memory of this upon returning home, he'd see if there was some sort of magic that could replicate it for his own personal use, but for now... well. He can go with this.

...so really, he is the absolute perfect target. he will never see it coming. or hear it, either...]

[king_of_heroes]

[ You know, Gilgamesh doesn't really hold grudges. Especially not against those mongrels he finds so utterly insignificant that he can hardly remember. But, you know. The way the guy seems so absolutely lost in whatever idiocy he happens to be involved with certainly makes him an easy target. And Gilgamesh really didn't care for easy targets, but fuck it. He's bored. He'll rev up the engine a little as a warning, not that Kayneth is even paying attention, before he comes barreling straight towards him with a cackle!

What happens next can only be explained by the perfect video from the perfect game. ]

[action]

[scorpiospider]

[What's that sound behind you? Did Vriska steal another motorcycle?]

[Yuuuuuuuup]

[And she's currently inexpertly zooming by you, Gil, in that rookie dumb luck way. Race her?]

[king_of_heroes]

[ Well, if it's a race she wants... He'll just shoot her an all too confident smirk before speeding up, maneuvering his way around whatever obstacles might get in the way. You know. Cars, inanimate objects, people, whatever. ]

Ha, a challenger? You truly are a fool if you believe you can beat me.

[sawthelight]

[feel a slight bump as you run over some poor girl's ridiculously long hair, Gilgamesh?]

Ow!!

[Rapunzel glares after him, quickly gathering her hair up against her body]

Please be more careful when you're moving so quickly!

[she can't be impolite if she tries...]

[king_of_heroes]

[ Wait, was that really...?

Geez, he thought it was just another one of those annoying yellow road bumps!

At least it didn't get caught up in the wheels, right? That would've been much worse. ]

Well, maybe you shouldn't leave your hair in the middle of the street. [Nevermind he was... driving on the sidewalk but whatever!!!]

action; WAIT I'M NOT DONE YET

[kitsunemimi]

[ Hey, hey Gil! That dragging feeling you've been getting from your bike for the past fifteen miles or so on your crash course through Prospero? Well if you bothered to actually check your damn side mirrors or look behind you just once you'd see Caster riding on the back of the bike, sitting sideways leisurely with a biiiiiiiiiiig smile on her face. ]

Ya~ho~! Ara ara, Blondie! Do you know any tricks?

[king_of_heroes]

[ WHAT IS IT WITH ALL THESE PEOPLE BECOMING UNWANTED BAGGAGE ON HIS GILGIL MACHINE DAMN IT? ]

Oi, foxgirl. Get the hell off! I never gave you permission to touch my property, much less ride it!

[ Cue swatting while driving with one hand. CLEARLY THIS IS SAFE AND NOT DANGEROUS AT ALL???? ]

[range]

[It's the pimp motorcycle AND IT'S COMING FOR YOU.

You didn't actually hit Grit, which is impressive that you completely missed him. Because he's pretty slow when it comes to movement.

Though the next time he comes around, he'll just go ahead and flick a cigarette to get his attention.

Grit is not responsible if your hair is on fire at this point, nope.]

[king_of_heroes]

[ You know, this had actually been a pretty fun day, excluding a few minor annoyances in the form of fellow servants but whatever. DON'T STOP ME NOW I'M HAVING SUCH A GOOD TIME ETCETC.

So of course, having something flicked at him and feeling his hair suddenly catch on fire due to the sheer volume of god knows what he puts in his hair to keep it looking amazing will prompt him yell in some ancient tongue, hop off his bike, proceed to find the nearest mongrel, rip their shirt off and use it to put out his hair.

Sorry, Grit. Turnabout is fair play. ]

action;

[breakingtraditions]

WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!?

[...guess who is almost ran over by that garish yellow motorcycle.]

[king_of_heroes]

[ Gold streak speeds by, Gilgamesh the Douchebag.
Too fast the the naked eye, Gilgamesh the Douchebag.
Gilgamesh! He can really move!
Gilgamesh! He's got an attitude!
Gilgamesh! He's the fastest thing alive!
etc etc. ]

My apologies, mongrel. I'll be sure to actually hit you next time.

[ He's kidding. Or is he? Dundunduuuun. ]