Dear Die-Ary #3 - Voice - Johnny C.

[becomes-cold.livejournal.com]

[Well, Johnny is in a peppy mood today. Or as peppy as he can be. So he'll actually bother to use the voice function on the device today.]

You know, all things considered, this town isn't as bad as the one I left. Don't get me wrong, from I shithole I came and apparently in a shithole I remain, but at least the feces and waste that is mankind isn't piled as high in this place. A guy bumped into me on the street and actually asked if I was okay. It was nice. So I did what any grateful person would and followed him home but only left a dead cat in his mailbox. I thought about throwing it in the treehouse he had for his kids, but I saw a couple squirrels in the backyard and I was afraid they'd see. Works just as well, I think. I mean he's either going to find the cat soon, or have just the most awkward goddamn conversation with his mailman.

Oh yeah. Considering a trend I've noticed, got a question for you people:

So. Who else here is actually dead?

Comments

[Voice]

[kindofademon.livejournal.com]

Me! I'm dead. I died once right before I got here, and once here.

[Voice]

[becomes-cold.livejournal.com]

Well that's probably for the best. I mean, back at your home I guess.

What's it like coming back to life? I mean I died, but I kind of just wound up here when I died. Like it was nothing special so I didn't know if it was when you die here and come back.

[Voice]

[kindofademon.livejournal.com]

It was... weird? Dying was more exciting, really. Coming back was like waking up from just a really, really long nap.

[Voice]

[becomes-cold.livejournal.com]

Exciting isn't exactly what I'd call dying, but alright.

I hate sleep. I don't think I even know what that feels like, to be honest.

[croibhristeoir]

...

[Okay, that was all incredibly strange.]

I am. Twice, though I believe I mentioned that before.

[becomes-cold.livejournal.com]

Jesus, both back home or once here?

I've got to give it to you, that is somewhat impressive if you managed to die twice wherever you're from.

Unless you're a vampire.

Are you a fucking vampire?!

[croibhristeoir]

Both of them back home. And I assure you, I am not a vampire.

[becomes-cold.livejournal.com]

So how the hell did you manage that? I mean, pardon me, but is it some weird case of you somehow got two killing blows on you before you dropped dead, or what?

[coldhearted-sun.livejournal.com]

I have. It wasn't pleasant for sure, but it was to be expected as such.

[becomes-cold.livejournal.com]

Nothing is pleasant about life, so I guess it's no surprise that death isn't particularly pleasant as well.

[coldhearted-sun.livejournal.com]

Mm. Still, I have found both to be quite enjoyable, at least. Having to go through each and every experience like a long journey, up until the end...I can honestly say it was fun.

[becomes-cold.livejournal.com]

Well fucking whoop-de-doo for you.

[needsteaplz.livejournal.com]

Why would you show gratitude by...never mind.

Yes, I did die before arriving here. It's actually the last thing I do remember from my home world.

[becomes-cold.livejournal.com]

Well shit.

I guess I was partially joking. I didn't think there were that many people here who had actually died but I guess it makes sense. I'm still not sure if this is Hell or what the fuck ever or what.

[needsteaplz.livejournal.com]

I don't think everyone has died before coming here. Still, it sounds plausible and then there's the Baron's theories which I'm sure he'd like to share.

Although to be honest, I'm not super upset about being here. After all, if I stayed any longer, I would've had my soul eaten by whatever killed me. I wouldn't be so quick to calling this hello. It could just be a collective afterlife...unless there's some kind of judgement waiting for us in the future.

[becomes-cold.livejournal.com]

The Baron? Seriously? Someone is calling himself a Baron here? Does he dress in a dainty little cape and flamboyant clothing too?

...I can understand that.

If they're going to judge me, they should be coming to an answer soon. It shouldn't take this goddamn long for them to decide something in my case.

[Voice]

[crownedexorcist]

Why do you want to know?

[Because he kind of died once. Or almost.]

[Voice]

[becomes-cold.livejournal.com]

That's rude. You're rude.

Maybe I would have told you but now I'm not. You could have just been nice and answered the question. But no it's people like you who have to pick and pick and pick. Always judging, always asserting they're better than others in some way and taking apart everything.

Just answer the question.

[Voice]

[crownedexorcist]

I'm just curious.

[Pause.]

I'm alive, but I kind of died once? But not quite.

[Voice]

[rookieforever.livejournal.com]

[After popcorn.gif-ing at the other responses to this...]

Am I the only guy here who isn't dead?

[Voice]

[becomes-cold.livejournal.com]

It's starting to sound like it. Jesus.

[Voice]

[rookieforever.livejournal.com]

And there were those murders last week...maybe he got me!

[Haha, no. Although...there was that crazy on the phone...]

[Voice]

[skaldssong.livejournal.com]

Hundred-percent bona-fide not-dead, here. Though not for lack of external forces trying, I guess. Any reason in particular why you're askin'?

[Voice]

[becomes-cold.livejournal.com]

Essentially because you're one of the first people I've talked to who isn't dead, it would seem.

[Voice]

[skaldssong.livejournal.com]

Well. That's putting a bit of a damper on all this "meet new people, see new sights" excitement. Making me wonder if I didn't just unknowingly pass away before coming here, too.